5 Things Men Do That Give Women The “Ick”

She’s gone cold on you…ghosted you…has no desire for you anymore? You’ve probably done one of these things and given her the ICK.

Acting “Too Into” her too quickly

No for real, this is a full level “ick”. After speaking to hundreds of women about this I can confirm that nearly every single one said that when a man was too nice and wanted to catch up with her straight away it was a huge turn off. It didn’t matter if you were the nicest, richest or even most talented guy she had ever met, this turned off women who worked in both moderately stressful to highly stressful jobs and who had come from all backgrounds including families who had gone through a divorce and families who were very close.

When asked what the reason was for this being such a turn off, majority of the women told me it was because of how available it made the man. Being “too into” a woman emasculated the man and made him look like he was needy and dependant. Those thoughts were linked to the following scenarios amongst majority of the women:

• The man was seen as being highly dependant on the women to be the bread winner, the provider and the head of the relationship — which was undesirable and emasculating.
• The man displaying these qualities was incapable of protecting the woman and their future family together.
• The man was seen as a gold digger or freeloader.
• The man would be controlling and have generally little to no ambition which meant the woman would need to take on the role of mother and father which lead to stress and anxiety.

Having more “female friends” than male friends

This was an interesting one, because a lot of the answers came with diversity. Some women found that it came from a place of insecurity where they had been cheated on and didn’t trust men as much as they used to, but the majority of reasoning behind this came down to masculinity, again. 8/10 women said it made them feel like the man was labelled more-so as a friend rather than romantic interest or he was probably gay and that’s as far as the pursuing went. Although harsh, a lot of the reasoning behind this came down to the impression that for a man to have mostly female friends he was probably rejected by mens groups/clubs due to factors such as not being cool, mentally tough, a hard worker or someone that could have fun.

Being “really close” to his mum

While some women found this “cute”, majority of them said this kind of closeness made them feel a huge ICK. The reasoning behind it was that in this man’s eyes his mother came before anyone and that meant even if the woman got married to him, had a house together or even a child he would still choose his mother over everything. Understandably, this was a huge concern amongst the women I spoke to. The comment that kept coming up was “ I mean when you’re choosing a partner to spend the rest of your life with why should his mum be a part of that?” — feelings that were commonly associated to this scenario included the following:

• He was a “mummy’s boy” and probably still played with his toys.
• He would never see her as the best thing in his life. That spot was filled by his mother.
• He didn’t have the capacity to stand up for himself if confronted by another man.
• He couldn’t protect his family if it came to a disaster situation.
• He didn’t have a strong mental capacity to deal with the emotions of others let alone himself.
• He was the kind of man that would see the woman as the breadwinner and could kick his feet back and be a house-husband.

Asking to split the bill on a date

You knew this was coming didn’t you? Good. It’s sinful.

This is the time you want to be winning a woman over, showing her how much of a manly man you are, how you can provide for her and your future together (even if you can’t) — first impressions count. When you ask to split a bill it’s like being 5 years old again and asking your parent’s to pay for your kids size bolognese at the local Italian restaurant. You just don’t do it as an adult. Most of the women I’ve spoken to about this have agreed, it’s one of the most emasculating things for a man to do on a first date. The immediate thoughts that most of the women I’ve spoken to have, are that he doesn’t earn enough, has no sense of chivalry or manners, isn’t into her, lacks ambition and has no masculine qualities including providing for her. It also plays a huge role in the long term aspects of the relationship, women like to compare and if you’re cutting corners because you don’t believe men should pay on a date ….well.

Seeing the dreaded “bum crack”

You really thought I wasn’t going to bring this up….

This is one of the biggest ICK’s you could ever think of. Especially if it’s sweaty, hairy or has fluff inside it. Don’t get me wrong, It’s a very specific ick and doesn’t mean you can’t be naked in front of her because this ick only happens when you are out in public. There’s something about seeing a half moon crack in the middle of the day in a place it’s not supposed to be showing. This could be when you’re getting out of the car, picking up a heavy box or going for a tennis serve. When speaking to women about what made this such a confronting and ickful moment, majority of women came to the conclusion that it was something that was meant to be private and wasn’t. It also made them feel like they were in the presence of a child who didn’t know how to take care of himself and respect those around him. The following thoughts were given for the dreaded bum crack:

• He had no standards of privacy. A carefree man who would be happy showing his crackage to anyone and everyone for free. It took away the element of surprise and desire for what was underneath his clothing.
• It showed he had no sense of hygiene.
• Not being able to feel that his pants were falling down showed a lack of general awareness which was seen as premature or childlike.

S.P